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Kids Who Do Too Much
March 24, 2008 |
Getting your kids involved with their community and in sports and other activities is an important part of teaching social and leadership skills, but some kids today are carrying such a heavy load of extracurricular activities that many parents wonder where it is necessary to draw the line. Sure, getting involved is important and it looks impressive on a college application, but should kids today have to sacrifice all their free time?
There are many reasons why today’s kids are doing more than ever. For one thing, college admissions are becoming more competitive each year, and as tuition rates rise dramatically, scholarships get more competitive too. Virtually no parent can afford the tuition bill for even one child, and with the economy in recession, loans could get more difficult to obtain. Kids are feeling the pressure from their families and schools to achieve that “edge” that will win them a big scholarship. But the race to be the most accomplished student can only go so far. A lot of high school kids today juggle after-school jobs, and they still need down time for friends or to just be alone.
Another reason for kids’ increasingly hectic schedules is that parents today are busier, too. Families with two parents working full time might encourage their kids to get involved in extracurricular activities so the kids can keep up with the parents’ busy lifestyle. On the other hand, when the kids have a crazy schedule, it adds stress to their parents’ lives as well.
Of course, kids might not realize that they are burning themselves out. Lots of kids who thrive on activity will take on one after another until they reach a crisis point – that project is due, they’ve got a midterm to study for, a piano lesson, track practice and prom committee meeting all in one night – and they realize they can’t handle everything they’ve taken on.
Parents can help prevent their kids from reaching that point by setting limits early on. A good way to tell if your child is doing too much is if their activities are adding a significant amount of stress to your life. If it’s too much for you, it’s definitely too much for them. It’s a good idea to limit your child to taking on one new activity at a time. Once he’s settled into a new routine and knows how much extra time and effort this new activity requires, then he can consider adding another one.
If your child is burnt out, don’t hesitate to drop one or two activities during the year. While it’s important to teach your child to stick to a commitment he’s made, you should also make sure he knows that it’s better for him to do one or two things very well than it is to take on ten different projects and run himself dry.
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